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Cartoons
Cartoons Last Updated: May 26, 2016
Courtesy: Pooki18


There are 66 cartoons available.


  



Late Night Jokes  
Last Updated: May 25
Courtesy: Newsmax
       

      

Conan
Tuesday Night, May 24 

Donald Trump is now ahead of Hillary Clinton in the polls. This was reported today in The Washington Post, and 2,000 years ago in the Book of Revelation.

Donald Trump is holding his first-ever campaign fundraiser but says he’s only doing it because the Republican Party asked him to. Yeah. Trump thought he should do this for the Republican Party, since he turned down their first request: Don’t be our candidate.

A recent survey found that Donald Trump is polling very badly among Asian-Americans. After hearing this, Trump said, “That’s odd, I haven’t even gotten around to insulting them yet. I got great material on them.”

Troubling news for Hillary Clinton. The FBI says as part of its investigation of Hillary Clinton’s emails, it may call her in to speak to them. No word yet on how much Hillary’s planning to charge. Could be as much as three grand, $300,000.

The security chief of the TSA has been fired. He’s been told to expect long lines at the unemployment line. Get there three hours early, take off your belt, your shoes.

The Centers for Disease Control reports that 80 percent of public swimming pools they investigated have health and safety violations. 80 percent! The study concluded with “enjoy your Memorial Day weekend.”     
      


Late Show With Stephen Colbert
Thursday Night, May 19

Ed Rendell tried to help Hillary Clinton by attacking her opponent, saying, "Trump's comments, like 'you can't be a 10 if you're flat-chested,' will come back to haunt him." And then Rendell helpfully added, "There are probably more ugly women in America than attractive women. People take that stuff personally." Yep, I have a feeling a lot of women are about to take that really personally.

The National Parks Service is so desperate for cash that they just announced that, for the first time, they are going to solicit corporate sponsorship. Pretty soon, those sequoias could be brought to you by Viagra. Remember, if your redwood lasts more than 2,000 years, call your lumberjack!

One of the ways that Trump is treating the convention like a reality show is holding off announcing his running mate. As one Trumpling said, "Announcing the vice-presidential nominee before the convention is like announcing the winner of 'Celebrity Apprentice' before the final show is on the air." It's an apt metaphor, because this year's Republican convention will be the series finale of America.   
 


 
The Late, Late Show With James Corden
Tuesday Night, May 24

Yesterday, a North Korean official turned down an offer by Donald Trump to visit the country and meet with Kim Jong Un, saying the offer is “propaganda” and “nonsense.” This doesn’t make Trump look good. You know you’re in trouble when the leader of North Korea is like, “I can’t associate myself with that guy.”

Trump got turned down for a meeting with Kim Jong Un. So I guess his search for a vice president isn’t going so well. Seriously, how do you get denied by North Korea?

A study by the Pew Research Center determined that more millennials between the ages of 18 and 34 are living with their parents than at any other point in history. Millennials were happy to take the poll, while their parents were proud of them for finishing the poll.

 
 
 

The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon
Tuesday Night, May 24

It’s been reported that the head of security for the TSA has been officially removed from his position. That’s right, he was told to turn in his badge, his uniform, his shoes, his belt, his keys, bottles over 4 ounces, his laptop, and any coins in his pockets. (I repeat! There should be NOTHING IN HIS POCKETS!)

 I saw that today, Donald Trump held a big rally in New Mexico. Which is weird, since he’s spent his whole campaign promising to ban NEW Mexicans.

Trump criticized Hillary Clinton over the weekend, claiming that her views are “just words” read off a teleprompter. But Hillary denied it, saying, “I’ve had these speeches memorized since I was six.”

Helen Hunt posted a photo on Twitter to show that her Starbucks barista wrote “Jody” on her cup because she thought she was Jodie Foster. Meanwhile, Jodie Foster is still at that same Starbucks going, “Where the hell is my damn coffee? What is TAKING so long?!”

Bernie said yesterday that his critics call him “Santa Claus” because of his white hair. Then Santa said, “Yeah — even I don’t promise people THAT much free stuff.”


Jimmy Kimmel Live!
Wednesday Night, May 11

A baby was born in India to what is believed to be the world's oldest mother. She's 72 years old, and her husband is 79 years old. They said they've wanted a baby for many years but they wanted to all be in diapers at the same time.

Speaking of old people surrounded by screaming young people, Bernie Sanders won the primary last night. For a guy with no chance of winning, he sure does seem to win a lot.

Hillary Clinton could lose all the remaining primaries and she'll still get the nomination, but at this point Bernie has a better chance of being drafted by an NBA team than being the nominee.

Trump is still out there taking aim and most recently, Trump gave Bernie Sanders a nickname. Now we have Crazy Bernie, Lyin' Ted, Little Rubio and Crooked Hillary — it's like the Spice Girls.

Paul Ryan and Ted Cruz are saying they're not ready to support Donald Trump. What do you have to do to get ready to support someone? Is it like getting a wax?

 
                                
 
    Late Night With Seth Meyers
  Tuesday Night, May 24
Bernie Sanders today campaigned in California just a few miles from Disneyland. Either that, or Grumpy was on a lunch break.

In an interview last night, Bernie Sanders talked about the chaotic primary season, saying, “Democracy is messy. Every day my life is messy.” Which is exactly the kind of comment you’d expect from a guy who always looks like he just rolled down a hill.

An Australian man is making headlines after he started treating an abandoned shopping cart as his son, naming it Trevor and giving it a pair of sneakers. Even sadder, he already had a son named Trevor.

Actor Shia LaBeouf has started hitchhiking around Colorado as part of a performance art piece he is calling #TakeMeAnywhere. Unfortunately for LaBeouf, everyone just keeps taking him back to the airport.  


 


 
 
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