Men across the nation are weeping tears of joy this week. Publicly and unabashedly. The election of Obama has validated and encouraged their right to publicly expose their sensitive inner selves to the world. Feelings rule.

Metrosexuals everywhere are experiencing a collective 'shiver up their legs', as they rush to inform one and all of the fascinating complexities and mysteries of their inner emotions.

 

Setting the example that the new man isn't a man unless he has the ability to shed tears on cue, was CBS' Harry Smith. At the end of Wednesday’s CBS Early Show, an emotional Harry Smith declared:"...I wept tears of joy last night."

 

Over on ABC, News correspondent Steve Osunsami was reporting live from Morehouse college, and when word of Barack Obama's victory came, "Steve found himself choking back tears". He then rushed off to pen his brilliant editorial, A Reporter Reflects on His Own Reaction to the Election. Girly Man meets the me generation.

 

Demonstrating that Girly Men transcend racial lines, the Reverand Jesse Jackson was caught on tape, weeping his own tears of joy on Obama's victory. I guess it hasn't sunk in that Obama's election takes all the arrows out of Jackson's quiver but, hey, a man can dream, can't he?

 

The Girly Men are back. With a vengence. And I expect they'll be granted a front row seat in any and all national conversations for the next four years. They are the new and improved version of men. Designed by feminists and launched in a successful frontal assault on America's outdated notion of masculinity.

 

Gone are the masculine heros of yesterday - the John Wayne's and the General Patton's. Gone are the the testosterone laden warriors and the outdated dudes who think their job is to protect women. They've been banished to the fringes of the 'politically acceptable', along with all the men who don't shave their chest hair. (And they don't even have 72 virgins to console them. Virginity has been banned as, well, unacceptable for any self-realized woman. Or girl.)

 

The new improved Girly Men are marching, (mincing) in lockstep in front of anyone who will watch, patting themselves on the back for having 'evolved'. These men have swallowed whole the feminist mantra that This Is What Women Want. A new, sensitive man. A man not afraid of feelings, a man in touch with his inner self who has the, yes, the raw courage, to shed the shackles (whew) of masculinity.

 

No longer will these men have to battle for their place in the pecking order by the old (brutal) traditional means. It has been decided by popular vote that feelings will now determine social ranking. Acerbic wit will replace arm wrestling. Tears will replace stoicism, dialogue will replace confrontation and liposuction will replace rippling muscles.

 

Nail polish and hair spray will become the new weapons in the battle of the sexes. And millions of men are rushing to re-invent themselves in the new, socially ordained and politically acceptable way. They have become 'empowered'. Metrosexuals are the new flavor of the day.

 

Centuries of conditioning are now considered moot. According to the new Girly Man rules, as laid out by feminists and validated by the recent presidential election, male challenges may now be met with understanding instead of a fist. Dialogue is in. Strength is out.

The new Girly Men are superior because they understand the root causes underlying bad behavior. And they're man enough to turn the other cheek. Next time someone kicks sand in their face, they have carte blanche to slink away, and feel self-righteous to boot. What a deal.

 

Girly Men have claimed the moral high ground and traditional methods of male behavior are to be considered déclassé. Feelings trump facts, intentions trump outcomes and tears trump fists. Men have evolved to a higher plane and they're loving it. 

 
So are our enemies.