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Top Idiots Of The Week
Nancy Morgan
RightBias.com
December 15, 2008
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AND THE WINNER IS:
Michael Jackson, the new King of Weird, wins this week's Top Idiot award. He was
caught sporting a new outfit that made him look like an Islamic Zorro. Michael's
new mask was an either an attempt to go incognito or a bow to Muslin dress codes
for women.
Tied for first place is our old buddy, Father Earth, algore. Just when you think
he can't spout anything more outrageous, out he comes with a new prophesy. This
time, Gore told a German audience last week that "The North Pole will disappear
in 5 years". Caught on video here.
RUNNER-UP:
In a classic "You've Got To Be Kidding Me" moment, PBS's Jim Lehrer actually defended the corrupt actions of Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich
Friday asking his guests, "What's the big deal here?" Words fail...
HONORABLE MENTION:
A 44-year-old man who uses oxygen was flown to Jaycee Burn Center in Chapel Hill
Monday morning after he lit a cigarette and set his face on fire.
This idiot apparently thinks O.J. is a victim of the white male patriarchy. Thank-you
Je$$e Jackson.
A retired New York City man says he's spent $7,500 fighting a $115
parking ticket because he's got "nothing else to do." Just imagine if we had term
limits...
A big OOPS to the medical examiner's office in Michigan. They decided it might be
best to cancel public school tours after a high school group inadvertantly watched the autopsy of a 14-year-old girl from their district.
A primary school teacher in Britain left a class of 25 pupils in tears after she
told told them Santa Claus did not exist. She has been fired.
STUPID CRIMINALS:
Note to Frazier: Do not lie to police about your name when your
surname is tattooed on your neck.
Two would-be burglars chose the wrong house to invade when they broke into an
Inwood home last week. They were greeted by the resident, who opened fire on them
with his AK-47-style assault rifle.
Idaho Sen. Larry Craig has lost his latest attempt to withdraw his guilty plea in a
Minneapolis airport men's room sex sting. Guess the rules apply to him after all.
I'm smiling.
Nearly $3 billion. That's the tax refund requested this year by a convicted armed robber in Pompano
Beach, according to a federal indictment. Guess he never learned to fly under the
radar.
JUST PLAIN WEIRD:
Cindy the poodle has won dozens of awards after being fluffed, shaved and coloured
to look like everything from a chicken to a dragon.
If you love something, set it free. And if you can't, call the police. That's the lesson a Dearborn man learned
after he handcuffed his wife to their bed but misplaced the key.
Green campaigners
called in police after discovering an illegal logging site in a nature reserve
- and rounded up a gang of beavers. Darn
Feel free to send in your own nominees for next weeks' Idiot Awards. Till next week,
take heart - no matter what mistake you might make, there's always someone out there
that can top it.
Nancy Morgan
RightBias.com
RightBias Idiot Awards may be reprinted, with attribution
to RightBias
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