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Cartoons
Cartoons Last Updated: September 2, 2015
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There are 45 cartoons available.


  



Late Night Jokes  
LAST UPDATED: September 3
Courtesy: Newsmax


Conan
Wednesday Night, August 26

 Today is a special day. Today is women's equality day. Donald Trump calls it, that time of the year again.

At a press conference yesterday, Donald Trump kicked out a Latino reporter but the man returned a few minutes later. Yeah, so already Trump's deportation plan isn't working.

Right now in the U.S. the most popular name for baby girls is Emma. The least popular names are Ashley and Madison.

It has come out that 100 ESPN employees were on the adultery website Ashley Madison. In other words, infidelity has finally entered the world of sports.  


 
The Late, Late Show With James Corden
Wednesday Night, August 19

Up to 11 states are poised to legalize weed, which would bring the total to 14 states. Marijuana activists are thrilled. They're saying, "Wow, 14 states. That's more than half of the states."

 The Idaho Department of Transportation has gotten rid of its 420-mile marker because stoners kept stealing it. The government is replacing the 420 signs with signs that read "Mile 419.9." They're going to be so upset when they realize that "419.9" is street slang for crystal meth. 

 
 
 

The Tonight Show With Jimmy Fallon
  Wednesday Night, September 2

In an interview with CNN, former Vice President Dick Cheney said that he has no plans to endorse Donald Trump. When asked if he'd have a change of heart, Cheney was like, "Yes, every week."

Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker says that he thinks only 12 states will decide the presidential election. And if Trump wins, those 12 states will include shock, confusion, outrage, despair, denial, anger, bargaining and finally acceptance.

President Obama is taking over the White House's official Instagram account this week to post pictures of his trip to Alaska. Or to put it another way, President Obama is now your annoying friend on vacation.

While he was in Alaska, President Obama stopped at a cafe and bought out all of their cinnamon rolls for his staff. The staff was like, "Thanks, Obama." And the guy behind him in line was like, "Yeah, thanks Obama."

Yesterday, UFC fighter Ronda Rousey accepted a Marine's invitation to the Marine Corps ball in December. When they heard Ronda Rousey was teaming up with the Marines, ISIS was like, "We surrender!" 


Jimmy Kimmel Live!
Monday Night, August 31

 Last night was the VMAs over on MTV, and Taylor Swift presented Kanye West with the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award. But there was little bit of a tense moment when Kanye West took the mic and said the award should have been given to Kanye West. It's you. Don't start this.

At the end of his speech, Kanye West announced that he's running for president in 2020. He announced he’s running for president after smoking a bunch of weed. Then Obama was like, “Been there!”

Trump is doing pretty well in the polls right now, and he’s pretty confident. Which may be why he’s said he doesn’t plan on running campaign ads that attack the other candidates. When asked who the ads would attack instead, he said "Their mothers! It's their fault those losers are here to begin with!"

 According to a new poll, Hillary Clinton has lost a third of her supporters in Iowa since May. There's still debate as to whether she lost them or just deleted them from her database.    

 
                                
 
    Late Night With Seth Meyers
  Wednesday Night, August 19
 A new CNN poll shows that Donald Trump is within six points of Hillary Clinton. It’s the closest Trump has ever gotten to a woman over 40.

According to a new list, Nashville is the friendliest city in America. While Philadelphia beat up the person who was putting together the list.

Former Subway spokesman Jared Fogle has pleaded guilty to child pornography charges. If convicted, he could be in jail for the next 35 to 40 sub-tembers.

Donald Trump said this week that he no longer thinks Heidi Klum is attractive enough to be called a 10. And then Jared Fogle ran in and said, “Wait, who’s 10?”  

 


 
 
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